30 Dec 10

Thursday’s Thoughts From a Bartender: New Year — New Beginnings

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By Jack Elliot

Five- Four-Three-Two-One…Happy New Year! Hello 2011! Finally, a brand new, fresh year. A year that will take us all to new places and put new people in our lives. And who knows, if all goes well, 2011 could be the year that brings that certain someone into your life.

As a bartender, I definitely see a lot of singles out and about trying to meet new people and make new connections around this time of year. A time which can be tough on singles, especially because the holidays are traditionally a time when being in a relationship and having someone to spend time and celebrate with are particularly valued and accentuated.

But if you are single, that doesn’t mean that you should give up hope of having a spectacular New Year’s kiss; New Years is also the time of new beginnings and fresh resolutions. Speaking of resolutions, do you have any idea what yours is going to be? Well, since I’m sure that you’ve already resolved to give incredibly generous tips to all the bartenders you meet over the next twelve months, not leave your credit card at the bar, bus your own table, and not order fancy cocktails when the bar is at capacity, I have an idea for you.

A lot of times at the bar I’ll see singles try to spark up conversation and really try to create something with another person to no avail. So, with this New Year, instead of being too critical or closed minded about particulars, perhaps one of the best New Years resolutions you could make would be to be more receptive and open to others when it comes to dating and new relationships, and give that person trying to chat you up a chance. With an open mind, who knows what could happen.

After asking a couple of single bar-goers what they thought of such a resolution, it seems that many people would be willing to give this resolution a shot (and perhaps one of tequila for themselves) in 2011.

“I think it’s a great idea,” says one twenty-something, “sometimes I can be way too tough on guys who approach me because of simple petty details. I’ll already have made up my mind about them within 30 seconds of meeting them.”

“I mean, why not? Putting myself out there and going on a date with someone who I may not typically be interested in at first sight couldn’t hurt” says another.

But it’s also important to keep in mind that you shouldn’t try to force something that isn’t there. There’s a fine line between putting yourself outside of your comfort zone and giving someone new a chance and leading someone on even though you know you don’t want to be with them. Just remember to keep in mind that if you gave someone a shot, and it didn’t work out, not too feel too bad about it, sometimes that’s just how it goes. And besides, 2012 is just around the corner anyways.

  • What do you think?

About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”

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