20 Feb 09

Dating, STD’s and One Night Stands

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Last week I went snowboarding and I met a super cute sexy guy while hanging out at the hotel bar, there was for sure some sexual chemistry going on, however I was there in the mountains on a mission purely to ride and decompress from what had been an extremely stressful past four weeks which meant that a sexy vacation fling aka one night stand with super cute sexy guy was not on the snowboarding vacation agenda.

After talking for awhile we figured out that we live about twenty minutes from each other, and the more we talked the bigger my super cute sexy guy crush got… (Wait should I insert a “falling in love quote” here?)

Long story short, while I was in town super cute sexy guy called my cell, the hotel room and sent text messages, but as mentioned I was there on a mission to “de-stress” and I was not into having a possible one night fling AT ALL!

Not to mention, knowing the STD statistics I did not need a potential STD infection or giant cold sore to add to what I was there to do — Relax!

So the idea of a sexy vacation fling with a super cute sexy guy was completely out of the question.

That being said, I had hoped that since we live close to each other that my super cute sexy man “crush” would contact me when we both got back home to hang-out and in the light of day not a dark hotel bar or hotel room — I could also make sure that he did not have a STD infection. (Hey, nothing wrong with a little cold sore prevention.)

And once I could give him a clean bill of health I pondered In the back of my head that perhaps something more meaningful may happen, more than just a sexy vacation fling — that didn’t.

Perhaps super cute sexy guy was a man that I would fall in love with and not just a one night stand? I had hope and the hope felt good since I’ve been working so hard — for a split second I had the vision of spooning with him all night after a night of great cold sore free sex.

…You know, I think that one of the hardest things about dating and getting a crush is not just about having to worry about a STD infection, it’s about hope!

It’s about looking at the person you just met and thinking that it could be… More.

Well, super cute sexy guy ended up to not be my Mr. More.

He contacted me a few days ago via voice mail and when I called him back it just became so clear to me that all he wanted was “sex.” My gut had him pegged.

After we got off the phone I sent him a text and asked him “never to contact me again.” He texted me back and asked “why?”

So I said this….

“Because I had a bit of a crush on you. My life as a CEO & founder of a dating site is full of Internet BS/Argh! It just seems like you are just looking for sex. My head is just not into that space right now. Been there done that. Anyway take care.”

After not hearing back (which comes as no surprise) I got a male take on this and posted this sex situation question to a friend on Facebook.

“If someone told you that it was obvious that you where just looking for sex.. what would you think? and would it matter?
and what if she told you that she had a crush on you and was not just looking for “sex” only…..”

And here is my friends reply.

“well, as a normal functioning male, I can aver that most of us are JUST looking for sex, regardless of what the intentions are of the other person. If a guy tells you differently, he is lying and probably trying to figure out a way to get sex since honesty isn’t working for him.”

I’m cold sore and STD free and I’m glad that I followed my gut about super cute sexy guy, the best part is that I still have hope!

  • What do you think?

About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”
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