12 May 11

Thursday’s Thoughts From a Bartender: My Date Tells Me What to Do

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By Daniel Ponsky

What is it inside of us human beings that stir our attraction for others? No easy question if you think about all of the different people you know and then think about the reasons why you like them. Is it on personal, social or business terms? Do they help make you money in your profession or simply have love for you because you have known them for forever and that’s just who they are. The point I am trying to get at is most of the times the reason I think we are attracted to a person in any walk of life is because that person in some way, shape or form accepts us for who we are and doesn’t tell is what to do. Unless it’s a parent, wife, or boss and that is what that is.

I have had my fair share of dates throughout the years. Some of them good, some of them bad, but the memorable one’s that always seem to stick around are of the girls that wanted to “run the show”. Bossy little drama queens was what they really were. Actress, princesses mostly who manage to slip underneath my radar until the second drink of the night awakened her inner Kraken. Oh my! Nothing stands out more then Donna. Now this girl could tell you who she was, where she was going, and why you weren’t good enough to be there with her when she finally gets there. And she would lay that smack down on a dude before the appetizer arrived just to let you know she got you. I respect that though cause she’s forward. No BS, no games, I found her to be refreshing compared to some of the hoochie mamacitas rolling around Los Angeles thinking they are somebody special. What is it with some of the women in this town who think their gift is to tell a man how to live his life? I mean who the hell are they to tell me where the best restaurant is to have sushi? It’s an opinion I get that but some of you ladies take it to another level and you look at food places like your comparing Versace purses. Just cause Leo eats there doesn’t make that place good. I mean how do you know that Leo don’t have an underdeveloped pallet from birth and can’t tell when the smelt is off on the California Roll? Just sayin.

Oh it goes the other way too. I have seen, known, and witnessed many a dude try and “run the show” by bossing his lady around. This sickens me. Nothing is worse then an out of control egotist who can’t get enough. Let me say this just to say this. If you are a woman and your man, lover, or whatever tries to run your world and tell you what to do in private, public or wherever, and that guy can’t no for an answer…leave his butt.

Believe me, it isn’t going to get any better. Public displays of affection can be heartwarming, but public displays of brutality can be nauseating and uncomfortable to anyone who has to witness it. Know who you are inside and out. Respect that, give that back in life, but never sacrifice it to anyone for anything. Our voice and our perspective make us who we are in this life and no one person should ever have the power to take that away.

  • What do you think?

About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”
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