9 May 11

Sasha Speaks: Answering Your Most Private Dating Questions — Mom’s a Date Crasher?

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Dear Sasha,
My Mom is great but she is very overbearing when it comes to dating and me. To the point of googling the men I date and even if I have told her where I’m going to be she will just so happen to show up. Needless to say, it’s hurt a couple of the relationships I thought could have had a future.
I know in the end she means well… BUT!!!

Sincerely,
Mom crasher’s daughter

Dear Crasher’s Daughter,
Your mom and my mom should hang out. If my relationships went one hundredth as well as my mother believed they would after the mere sentence, “I have a date…” I’d have been married a thousand times and have dozens of babies. Over the years I’ve learned the kindest thing to do is simply not to tell her. It saves me the stress and her the deflation if things don’t work out.

If you know your mother kicks things into high gear and starts perusing wedding gowns and invitations every time a new man comes into your life, hold those cards a little closer to your chest until there’s something for her to be really excited about. Treat it like one of those spy movies where a high powered government official whips off their blackout sunglasses and gets to growl at someone, “You’re on a need to know basis—and you don’t need to know.”

But you should also follow her lead a little bit. Regardless of what Marilyn sings, Google is a girl’s best friend. We live in a big, crazy, sometimes very scary world and you should be aware of who you’re inviting into your life. Remember afterschool specials about Stranger Danger? Creeps don’t only drive white windowless vans and offer you candy. They can also drive Audis and Toyotas and hybrids and take you to sushi dinners. A savvy gal always does a little internet research. Just be judicious and remember there’s a thin line between “research” and “stalking.”

Good luck!
Sasha

*Feel free to email us with any dating, relationship, love and sex questions you may have for Sasha.

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About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”
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