12 Jan 11

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… I’ve Been Dumped for Another Man

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By Patrick Curry

Somehow, someway, somewhere you meet her. Not just her, but Her. Then, you get to know her, and it’s great. Then you fall, really fall for her, and it’s fantastic. Your relationship takes off, all systems go, the months fly by and things couldn’t be better. Colors are brighter, foods tastier, and the whole nine yards. Until, all of a sudden, just like that, out of the blue nowhere, she finds someone else, she blows you off. So, women ask, how does it feel for a guy when he’s blown off?

To give you an honest and blunt opinion, it is a miserable experience. Absolutely miserable. And, I think I’m safe when I say that it’s probably incredibly similar to the way a woman feels when she gets blown off. Regardless of gender, at the end of the day, true feelings are true feelings, and they can really get hurt. I mean, I could give you the stereotypical, masculine, cold shoulder no emotion point of view, which is true for some guys and to some extent; but any guy whose ever been in a great relationship, or any guy that is worth being in a great relationship with, will actually feel. And the worst part about it is the other guy. But to answer your question in full, I’ll give you an account of the various stages any decent hearted male will go through when he’s dumped for another.

Initially you’ll ask, question, obsess over, what it is that he has that I don’t. What does she see in him that she doesn’t see in me? And this period will go on for a while and won’t get you anywhere really except feeling sorry for yourself and angry at her. After that, thankfully, eventually, and most likely due to good, sense-talking friends, you’ll start to realize that yeah, you really liked her, and things were great, but if you were putting your true self out there, and that didn’t do it for her, then it’s her loss.

Maybe it sounds a bit cliché, but it’s the truth. And then you’ll start to realize that all the negative thoughts aren’t really worth it. And after that, sooner or later, you’ll be over it. Of course, every now and then maybe you’ll hear a song or think of something that will remind you of her and give you an unexpected pang, but even those will lessen in time. And then, most likely due to the same good, sense-talking friends, who also like to take you out on the town and buy you rounds of drinks, you’ll meet someone new.

So yeah, it definitely hurts to be blown off- I’d be lying if I said it didn’t. But is it the end of the world? Of course not.

  • What do you think?

About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”

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