13 Oct 10

A Woman’s POV: Surrender Dorothy – A Message for Ladies on the Hunt

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Surrender Dorothy: A Message for Ladies on the Hunt

By Dani Katz

It really shouldn’t be this hard, you think as you scour yet another suspiciously accomplished, allegedly available guy’s personal profile, wondering if “the One” your every fairy tale promised would really brave a comb-over paired with Mala beads and admit to liking the whiny, pop mediocrity that is Coldplay.

You’re right: it’s not supposed to be anywhere near this hard, and the reason it is so hard is because you’re forcing an issue that simply cannot be forced.

For starters, you are a woman. Sure, you may very well be a forthright and empowered goddess, but, the fact remains, you’re still a woman. As woman, your responsibility in the mating game is to allow, receive and respond. And no, this is not an old-fashioned, put Baby in a corner sort of sexist generalization. This is biological imperative; this is Universal Law.

Gender is a basic law of this third dimensional reality. It’s like gravity, which you may resent, resist and even attempt to fight with underwire and collagen, while the truth of the matter is, you’ll never win because gravity is. It’s the same with gender: there is masculine energy and there is feminine energy – neither is better or more important than the other, they simply are; and, they are different.

While the feminine receives and allows, the masculine is meant to direct its energy towards the object it desires; taking action in single-minded, focused pursuit of thing X – be it buffalo, Himalayan peak or woman. If you get confused, just use your genitals as a handy-dandy reference – the penis points towards what it wants, directs itself inside and, once there, thrusts ever deeper into the soft, wet, warm vessel that receives it, that allows itself to be penetrated in the space it lovingly holds.

Hunting, or in this case – scrolling – is the man’s job. Men freeze when they become the object of woman’s pursuit. They have not the slightest clue how to respond – because they’re not responders by nature – they’re directors. When we beat them to their own biological imperative, the last thing they want to do is engage because we’ve emasculated them. They’ve no idea what to do with their penises when we’re so quick to whip out our (bigger, better, stronger) own, and smack ‘em around with ‘em.

As a woman, your job is to respond to what the Universe puts in your path, and if that’s a whole lot of empty space, then get creative and make the most of it. Log off and learn to love yourself single. If there’s no man in your field to wine and dine you, then surrender to what is – your solitude – and stop whining about what isn’t (Prince Charming). There are no mistakes and everything is perfect, so if you’re alone, that’s exactly where you’re meant to be. Cozy up to it, and make it delightful. Your life is right here, right now – there’s nothing and no one to wait for to start living the hell out of it.


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About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”

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