6 Oct 10

A Man’s POV: How it Makes Me Feel When… I Know She’s Into Me – But I’m Not Into Her

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By Patrick D. Curry

“Could you pass me the keys to the car?” she asks him as she stares directly into his eyes. “But honey, there aren’t any pomegranates on sale,” he responds, as he absentmindedly gazes into the sky.

Although communication between males and females isn’t usually so completely discordant and illogical as the example above, it definitely does have its fair share of shortcomings.

How many numerous conversations do you think go on everyday between two men venting about the frustrations, limitations, gaps, breaches, and pitfalls that they have experienced when dealing and communicating with women, and vice versa- how many of these conversation have you had recently?

From my own personal experiences and circle of friends, I don’t think that I’m getting ahead of myself when I say that this communication problem is perhaps one of the top three topics (along with weather and traffic) most often discussed, argued over, debated, rehashed, and joked about everyday between all human beings on every continent and island.

One particular issue that comes up every now and then is the “she’s into him, but he’s not into her” problem. Every so often, a female friend of mine will describe her frustration with a new guy she likes a guy she had a great initial connection with, but who seems to be more and more elusive and harder to get into contact with as time progresses.

So how does one go about explaining or understanding this issue? How come some guys, for what seems to be no reason whatsoever, can have no qualms about blowing off incredibly attractive women?

Well, as a member of the testosterone infused gender myself (and thus equipped with a masculine mind), I will be the first to admit that my compatriots and I are all very confused individuals – and at times completely irrational beings acting on whims that we ourselves cannot fully explain.

So, one answer to the problem is that men are odd and illogical, which, besides stating the obvious, doesn’t really solve much. But another solution or understanding to this problem that has been brought up is the issue of chemistry and compatibility.

Sometimes a person can be head over heels for someone, and for some reason – and you could call it chemistry – that person just doesn’t feel the same way. As someone who’s been on both sides of the equation, I know from personal experience that it really isn’t fun to be on either side.

The best advice I can give though, is that although it can hurt to fall and its really easy to become jaded, you should keep your head up, because eventually, no matter what, you will find that person (like my beautiful girlfriend) who you will have exploding chemistry with and won’t mind your absurd comments about pomegranates.

  • What do you think?

About Jennifer Kelton

Jennifer KeltonI did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”
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