25 Feb 09

4 Ways Being Open Builds a Strong Relationship

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Today Dating Expert and Dating Coach David Wygant as seen in Playboy TV, Maxim.com, The Seattle Times, Dateline NBC and MTV just to name a few is guest blogging.
His words of wisdom are right on target! Without healthy communication where would we all be?
Enjoy!

By David Wygant

Let’s talk about building a relationship. It’s really interesting. So many people don’t understand how to build a relationship. Of course people always come to me seeking advice on how to meet someone, but the question is what do you do once you do meet someone?

Whether you’ve just met someone you really like or whether you’re already in the process of dating, how do you build a relationship up so that it’s strong enough to really work out and last? Here are four ways that being open can create and build a strong relationship:

1. Being Open Keeps You On ‘The Same Page’: The most important thing to do to achieve this is to make sure you have open lines of communication. If you are dating someone now, then ask yourself this: Do you do recaps with each other? Something I find really important to building a relationship is as much as possible to recap everything that’s happening between the two of you. Talk about things. Talk things through.

2. Being Open Creates A Safe Haven: Once you can be open with one another, you will be surprised how many parts of your relationship will improve. You know, it’s interesting, because I was dating a woman one time who was definitely a little more conservative than I was sexually. So in order to really to get her to open up sexually with me, we created open lines of communication about sex and really talked about it. You know what happened? She not only opened up sexually with me, she opened up emotionally as well. Another time I was dating someone who was really uncomfortable communicating about almost everything. She really was not comfortable communicating about things, especially feelings and emotions. So what I had to do was to make a very safe haven for her to talk about things and to share things with me. Once I did that, she did open up and shared amazing parts of herself with me.

3. Avoiding Possible Confrontation Won’t Help A Relationship: If something is bugging you, don’t be afraid to talk about it with the new person you’re dating. Opening up the lines of communication like this is the only way you can get in touch with each other, and really start to learn about each other. Don’t be afraid to say things that are on your mind, because they’re going to find out sooner or later anyway . . . plus, it’s better to find out as much about someone as soon as possible. Think about the alternative. Otherwise six months could go by before something is out in the open, which is six more months that you both have invested your hearts into the relationship and each other.

4. Being Open Creates A Better Relationship Than You’ve Ever Had: My suggestion, then, is to go and really open up a distinct line of communication with the person you’re dating. Be open. This will not only make it more likely that you will be able to build a strong relationship, but it will enable you to create a deeper connection and unique bond with each other. Remember that your goal is not just to have a relationship which “isn’t bad,” but to have one that is amazing and incredible. Being open like this is how you achieve that.

So communication is really, really important to building a strong relationship. It’s very important to have open lines of communication at all times, because when you do you are able to establish a relationship that keeps getting better and is better than any relationship you’ve had in the past.


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About Jennifer Kelton

I did not wake up one morning and say “hey I think I’d like a man use my sweater like a towel, write a candid dating book, become a dating expert, the CEO and founder of a social dating site and have three blogs.”

All of this has happened in a slow burn and here I am. The good, the bad, the mistakes, way too many tears shed to count, lots of wine and oh my goodness a huge learning curve that leaves me much of the time saying, “I’m sorry but this is all new to me.”
Read more...

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